High on Coffee
by My Left Eye Sees Ghosts
Summary: New and Improved! The strangest events in the world can happen if you give Danny Zucko one cup of coffee too many. Sandy and the rest of the Grease cast learn this the hard way.
1. The Boring Beginning: Skip if You Wish

High on Coffee

Summary: The strangest events in the world can happen if you give Danny Zucko one cup of coffee too many. Sandy learns this the hard way.

Disclaimer: I don't own Grease, and I'm sure glad I don't! (I had to do a Grease Jr. play at my school, and guess who I was?)

P.S. - I have writer's block on my other story, Aishiteru: Ryou's Gift. Sorry, Shandra-Chan.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 1: Thus Begins the Tragic Tale...

It was a sunny winter Saturday in 1959. We're in a small Californian town, home of Rydell HS.

Somewhere in this small town, in a Starbucks coffee shop- wait, you say Starbucks wasn't invented yet in the 50s! Well, too bad; in this story it was!

Ahem...anyways, somewhere in this town...in a Starbucks coffee shop...there's a boy and a girl. Can you guess who they are? You want more details, you say? Well, the boy has black hair and the girl has blonde hair. Can you guess who they are now? Well, if you guessed Sandy and Danny, then you're right. If you guessed something else, then...I don't know what you were thinking.

Anyways, what else could dear little Sandy Olsen and Danny Zucko be doing in a coffee shop together on a sunny winter Saturday? Why, they were on a coffee date, of course! (Danny was broke and couldn't afford anything else.) Anyways, they were sitting at the front counter, happily chit-chatting and waiting for someone to come serve them.

Just then, a young man in an apron that said 'Starbucks Coffee Waiter' came to the young couple's spot at the counter. "Howdy! May I take y'all's order?" he asked the two slowly with a strong Southern accent.

While Danny was busy grimacing at the man's uncivilized drawl, Sandy said in her usual saccharine voice: "Yes, please. I'll have an iced coffee, please, and..." she paused and looked over at her boyfriend. "Danny, what would you like?"

Danny abruptly turned away from the disturbing waiter. "Ugh..." he moaned. "I'll just have a decaf...heavy on the creamer..." He moaned again and stuck out his tongue in abhorrence.

"Danny!" Sandy hissed softly at her boyfriend and then turned back to the waiter. "I'm sorry, sir," she apologized tentatively. "He's...umm..."

The man smiled at the girl, showing all of his rotten yellow teeth. Danny glanced at the mere sight of it and nearly lost his breakfast. "Naww...it's alright, Miss," the nauseating waiter reassured in his heavy Southern drawl. "Say, you've got yourself a purdy accent there. Where ya from?"

For once, Danny was glad he was not the center of attention, but his girlfriend somehow didn't seem to mind the revolting waiter. "I'm from Australia, sir," she told the man. She was smiling her usual oh-so-innocent, melt-my-frigin-heart smile. Of course, she was just being polite; inside she felt as if she were going to be sick.

While Danny was absorbed in trying to hold his breakfast in, the waiter toyed with Sandy's blonde hair. "Yer know what, Miss?" he started to say. "You really remind me of this girlfriend I used to have back on the farm. Yep, she had yeller hair and blue eyes just like you."

_Stop touching me...get your filthy hands away from me..._ Sandy loathed this strange man who was putting his big hairy hands all over her hair. But, of course, she pretended to be pleased by the man's words. "Did she really?" she asked with all the fake cuteness she could muster.

The man smiled again, which somehow caused him to accidentally yank a lock of Sandy's golden hair. The poor girl yelped and screamed in pain, causing the waiter to let go and jump back abruptly. "Oh dear...I'm so sorry..." the waiter drawled slowly. "You know what? I think it's high time to go git y'all's coffee now." With that, he walked away to get the young couple's order, allowing Danny a huge sigh of relief. Sandy, on the other hand, began the painful process of getting all the newly-formed knots out of her now-matted hair (thanks to that hillbilly waiter).

Oh boy, the readers are complaining. They want me to get to the part where the coffee-high-ness begins. Hold your horses, people!

Anyways, several minutes later, the waiter came back carrying a tray with several cups on it. "Here ya go, son!" he said as he placed a cup of decaf in front of the disgusted Danny. Then the man turned to Sandy and placed not one, but THREE cups of coffee in front of her. "Here ya go, Miss," he said with a grin. "Think of that there extra two as 'Welcome to the States' presents. It's on me!"

Danny frowned at the man's favor for his girlfriend, but Sandy smiled and thanked him auspiciously.

OK, anxious readers! The fun will soon begin!

"Danny, I can't finish all of these extra coffees," Sandy said to her boyfriend once the waiter had left.

The boy smirked. "Well, why don't I help you?" he suggested coolly.

Sandy nodded approvingly. Danny immediately pushed his own decaf aside and grabbed one of the extra cups of coffee. He started chugging it down aggressively.

"Be careful, Danny!" Sandy cautioned the boy, but he took no heed. He just kept on guzzling the caffeinated beverage until the last drop was gone. Then he grabbed the other extra cup and started taking huge swigs from it.

"More coffee!" Danny bellowed after he had licked his second cup clean. Sandy was becoming very worried because, as we know, Danny Zuckousually doesn't raise his voice, but she hesitantly gave the boy her own half-finished cup anyway.

Danny snatched the cup from his girlfriend's hand and drained it down in less than three gulps. "Mmmm...yummy!" he roared after he had finished his third cup of coffee. Actually, it was more like his 2.5th cup, since Sandy had only given him 0.5 of a cup, but we won't bother with the details. The important thing was: Danny Zucko had too much coffee!

Danny was very still for a moment. Then, suddenly, he went bug-eyed and yelled "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" But apparently, that was not enough. He then began blurting out random nonsense about what to do with pumpkin seeds and neon-green bunnies.

Now, if yournormally-calm-and-cool boyfriend was acting very weird and hyper because he was high on coffee, I'm sure you'd be very concerned. That was exactly how Sandy was feeling at the moment: concerned.As Danny yelled random things about Lhasa Apsos across the shop, poor little Sandy pondered her fate.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Haha! Whadya think? R&R, por favor!


	2. Fun at the Playground

Chapter 2: Fun at the Playground

_This is terrible! What am I going to do? _ Sandy thought to herself. As we remember from the last chapter, Danny had just had 2.5 cups of coffee and was now coffee-high, and Sandy was extremely worried.

Somehow, Danny's caffeinated brain had led him to thinking about Lhasa Apsos. He had been yelling across the shop (which was empty, thank god) about how to properly brush an Apso. But now, something else triggered his mind. "PLAYGROUND!" he suddenly shrieked excitedly, causing Sandy to fall out of her chair.

Normally, if Sandy had fallen out of her chair (which probably would never happen normally), Danny would bring out his rare gentleman and try to help her up, but today was special. Instead of being a man, he decided to be a 3-year-old. "PLAYGROUND!" he shrieked again. He then seized Sandy's wrist and darted out of the coffee shop, dragging the poor girl along with him.

"Danny, you forgot to pay!" Sandy screamed while trying to keep up with the sprinting boy. Then she quickly added: "What about your car?"

Danny didn't care about money or his car. He only had one thing on his mind. "Playground playground playground!" he yelled continuously, running in the direction of a nearby playground.

Anyone in the right mind would know that something was not right. People stopped to stare at the anomalous sight of a teen boy running down the sidewalk at lightning speed dragging along a screaming girl. But Danny ignored all these gawking people. He only had one thing on his mind. "Playground Playground playground!" he yelled his battle cry as a warning for all people to move out of his way. "Playground playground playground!"

Several minutes later, the two arrived at the nearby playground where a group of 8-year-olds were hanging out. Danny scanned the area quickly and yelled: "SLIDE!" Then, still holding on to Sandy's wrist, he whizzed to the tall metal slide. He pushed aside an 8-year-old and raced up the steps to the slide. Then, still grasping Sandy's wrist tightly, he slid on his belly down the slide, pulling the poor girl along. The two landed in a heap on top of each other once they had slid to the bottom. "SLIDE!" Danny screamed again and bolted up the ladder again, still pulling poor Sandy along. They slid again and again and again and again...

But when they had landed in a heap on top of each other at the bottom of the slide for the 50th time...

A bluebird flew by and landed several feet away from the two.

"BIRD!" Danny cried and jerkily let go of Sandy's wrist, which caused her to fall face-down on the ground and get a mouthful of dirt. The caffeinated boy then took off like a rocket and chased after the poor bluebird.

And the startled bluebird flew away.

"Bird!" Danny whined. "Bird bird bird bird!" Then his caffeinated brain got an idea. He ran back to his girlfriend (who had managed to pick herself up) and whined to her instead, as if she were his mother rather than his love interest. "Bird bird bird!" he insisted. Then he stamped his foot angrily. "I want a bird!" he demanded.

_This is getting out of hand... _Sandy thought as her boyfriend threw a hissy fit in demand for a bird. Then something caught the girl's eye. There was still hope after all! It was a pay-phone- wait, you say pay-phones weren't invented yet in the 50s? Well, too bad!

Anyways, Sandy had caught a glimpse of a pay-phone standing on the other side of the playground. She silently slipped away from her caffeinated boyfriend and tiptoed ever-so-carefully to the savior pay-phone. She put a penny into the slot and dialed her best friend's number. (As we all should know, Sandy's best friend is none other than Frenchy.)

"Hello?" a voice came from the other side of the line. It was Frenchy's mother.

"Hi. May I speak with Frenchy, please?"

A laugh came from the other side of the line. "Why, you have an Australian lilt in your voice! You must be Frenchy's Australian friend. I've heard so much about you. Well, g'day, mate!"

Sandy rolled her eyes. As we know, she hates it when people poke fun at her Australian background.

"Sandy? You still there? Well, I'll go get Frenchy right away." There was a clicking sound of the mouthpiece being set down, followed by a booming "FRENCHY! PHONE!"

Frenchy's familiar voice was heard saying: "Who is it?"

"It's your friend!" her mother answered. "The one with the funny accent!"

Now, if this had been a normal day where Danny was not high on coffee, Sandy, who was a bit over-sensitive, would've been very upset by all this you-have-a-funny-accent business. But since this was not a normal day, she was too anxious to feel hurt.

Several moments later, Frenchy came to the phone. "Hello?"

Sandy breathed a small sigh of relief. "Hello, Frenchy, I'm so glad you're here."

"What is it, Sandy? You don't sound too good."

Sandy frenetically began explaining what had happened at the coffee shop.

"Whoa, slow down there! Now, slowly tell me what happened."

"Danny's been caffeinated!"

Frenchy made a tsk-tsking sound with her tongue. "That sounds bad. You know what? Why don't you bring the guy over to my house, and I'll give him 'the treatment'. Is that OK?"

Sandy hesitated for a moment. "W-what's 'the treatment'?"

Frenchy made some popping sounds. "Just come, OK?"

"OK, thanks. Bye." Sandy hung up and went back to Danny, who was climbing a tree.

"Squirrel!" the boy screamed while trying to heave himself farther up the tree. "I want a squirrel!"

Sandy pondered for a moment on how to get the caffeinated boy's attention. Then something hit her like a speeding bullet. She decided to use rude humor: something she had heard a lot of since she arrived in the US (thanks to Rizzo), but never actually brought into play herself. "Hey, Black-butt, did you hear?" she began. "Yo mamma's so fat it's not even funny, but the ground is cracking up!"

And it worked! Danny stopped his pursuit for the squirrel. "What did you say?"

For once, Sandy was actually happy for Rizzo's uncouth and offending jokes. "I said, yo mamma's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention!"

Danny was actually non-caffeinated for a moment. "Hey, don't talk about my mother like that!"

Sandy gathered up all the toughness she could manage (which, unfortunately, was not very much). "What are you going to do about it?" she said, trying to transform her naturally soft and musical voice into a loud and tough one.

Danny was stock-still for a second. Then he started laughing. No, 'laughing' is not the word. 'Howling' was more like it. He was howling so hard, he nearly lost his grasp on the tree. In fact, sooner or later, he did lose his grasp and came plummeting down. Even after that, he was rolling on the ground laughing his butt off.

By that time, Sandy felt three different ways. 1.) She was worried that Danny might've hurt himself. 2.) She wondered how to get him off the ground and stop laughing. And most importantly, 3.) She wondered what on earth could've made him laugh so hard.

Danny, on the other hand, was still rolling on the ground howling like a monkey.

"Danny, what are you laughing at?"

Danny slapped the ground several times and then exclaimed between laughs: "It's you! You should've seen yourself!"

Sandy looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"The way you try to sound tough is so...so..." He burst into laughter once more.

Sandy rolled her eyes. "Come on, Danny. You're going to get help." She paused for a moment, and then added: "We're going to see the doctor."

Upon hearing the word 'doctor', Danny stopped laughing and went nuts. "Doctor!" he cried as if his own girlfriend was a lunatic. "I don't wanna go to the witch doctor!" Then something triggered his mind. "Witch doctor!" he exclaimed with glee. Then he started to sing a beloved childhood clapping game tune. "I saw the witch doctor and asked her what to do! Then she said ooh eee ooh aah aah fizzle popple walla-walla bing-bang..."

Apparently, Australian schoolchildren never played that clapping game, because Sandy was looking at Danny as if he was crazier than he already was. But she did see that this was the perfect chance to get the caffeinated boy outta there. She helped him up onto his feet and took his hand. She took him out of the playground and led him in the direction of Frenchy's house.

Danny was still singing the Witch Doctor Song.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finally, a use for my Yo Momma jokes! Well, R&R, por favor. No Chapter 3 until I get 5 reviews (since no one ever comes to the Grease section cuz they're all in the HSM section). And Ch. 3 is where Danny encounters Frenchy, the Witch Doctor who's armed with needles! So if you wanna see that, you'd better gimme a review!


	3. Danny, Sandy, and the Witch Doctor

A/N: OK, this is REALLY disappointing. 16 people visited this story, but only 2 managed to make it to Chapter 2. Is this story boring or something? Constructive criticism, please!

Oh, yes, and I apologize for Frenchy's OOC-ness. And any other OOC-ness.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 3: In Which Danny is Stabbed and Sandy is Embarrassed by the Witch Doctor

As we recall from the last chapter, Sandy, our beloved Australian heroine, is taking Danny to Frenchy's house. Danny, who's high on coffee, is singing the Witch Doctor clapping game song.

"I called the Witch Doctor and asked her what to do..."

"Danny, please..." Sandy pleaded, but was unheard.

"And she said ooh eee ooh aah aah..."

Sandy wondered how much longer it was to Frenchy's house. Since our Australian heroine was from a big city (Sydney, Aus.), she naturally preferred taking public transit. But since Rydell, CA was too small for any public transportation services, she was forced to walk several miles with her caffeinated boyfriend on her own two feet.

"Fizzle popple walla-walla bing-bang..."

However, since she was from one of the world's hardest-to-navigate cities, she had a good memory and sense of direction. She clearly remembered the way to her friend's house, even though she had only been there once.

"Toot toot!"

Somehow the trip seemed to take longer than last time. Maybe it was because she was traveling on foot, whereas last time she was in a car. Or maybe it was because the weather was a bit cooler than last time (even though Rydell winters are pretty mild). Or maybe it was even because her caffeinated boyfriend was blaring pure nonsense right in her ear. Yep, it was definitely option 3.

"So I called the witch doctor and asked her what to-"

"Danny, you don't need to call the witch doctor anymore, because we're at her house now!" Sandy said cheerfully. At last, they had reached their destination: Frenchy's house.

Danny was silent as Sandy led him to the Witch Doctor's front door. But the second his girlfriend reached out to ring the doorbell, he exploded and started screaming bloody murder.

Frenchy came to the door and opened it. "What's all that noise?" she complained. Then she was met by Danny screaming like a little girl on her front step. Of course, he was accompanied by his girlfriend, who was becoming very annoyed (and deaf).

"Ah, Miss Olsen!" Frenchy yelled, trying to pass her voice through Danny's booming screams. "So, is this the patient?"

"Yes!" Sandy yelled. The two girls sounded as if they were trying to communicate from opposite sides of a football field, all thanks to Danny's continuous screaming.

Over-confident and self-assured as usual, Frenchy pulled a random balled-up sock out of nowhere and stuffed it in Danny's mouth. The boy did not react well to this; he started jumping up and down like a little boy who didn't get his lollipop.

The two girls left Danny to his jumping and walked upstairs to Frenchy's bedroom.

"So, Miss Olsen, I need to ask a few questions first," Frenchy began once they were up in her bedroom. "Now, let's see..." she mused, trying to sound proper and professional, "has he had anything to eat in the past three hours?"

"Yes, he had 2.5 cups of coffee about an hour ago."

"No, I mean, besides that."

"Then, no."

"Uh-huh." Frenchy pulled out a clipboard and pretended to write things down. "When did he go to bed last night?"

"I don't know; probably really late."

The American girl put a serious look on her face. "Miss Olsen, that's not good," she said. "Oh well, never mind that. When was the last time he micturated?"

The Australian girl looked confused. "He what?"

The American girl sighed. "You know, drained a weasel, watered a tree, saw a man about a dog, took a pit stop..."

The Australian girl looked even more confused. "I don't think he's done any of these things before..."

The American girl- hold on, the readers are complaining. They want to know why I'm calling Sandy 'the Australian girl' and Frenchy 'the American girl'. Well, BCUZ I CAN AND U CANT DO NETHING BOUT IT!

Eugene: Miss Authoress Person, it's virtually impossible to verbalize tech-lingo.

Shut up, Eugene. Anyways, on with the story!

The American girl- wait, the readers are complaining again. They want to know where Danny is right now. Well, let's go have a look-see, eh? Ah, yes, Danny is busy sniffing scented soaps in Frenchy's downstairs bathroom. Now, let's get back to the story, shall we?

The American girl- OH MY FLIPPIN GOD THE FRIKKIN READERS ARE COMPLAINING AGAIN! They want me to change 'the American girl' back to 'Frenchy', and 'the Australian girl' back to 'Sandy'. Fine, fine, B DAT WAY!

Eugene: Uhh...Miss Authoress Person...

SHUT THE –BLEEP- UP, EUGENE! clubs Eugene

Eugene: Waaah! Mommy!

Ahem, anyways...

FRENCHY slapped her forehead. But her frustration was immediately replaced by giddiness. "Hey, Sandy," she started, a devious smile forming on her face, "has he engaged in any sexual activity lately?"

SANDY turned as red as a beet. "N-no!" she managed to stammer.

"Are you SURE...? ABSOLUTELY SURE...?"

The blonde girl merely nodded. She was lost for words. How could her best friend ask her a thing like that?

The chestnut-haired girl smirked. "You know, I'd think you two would've had at least SOME activity!"

The blonde girl shook her head furiously, trying to shake off all the bad thoughts.

"Maybe you two should try to-"

"No! No no no no no no no n-"

"Aww...but why not?"

"I'd lose my virginity!"

"Haha! You'd lose your virginity! What's the matter? You scared of something like that?"

The blonde girl- GOSHDARNIT STUPID READERS WHAT'S THE MATTER NOW? Oh boy, they want to know why I'm calling the two girls 'the blonde girl' and 'the chestnut-haired girl'. Well, because 'Frenchy' and 'Sandy' are BORING! Ahem, anyways...

The blonde girl looked surprised. What was going on? Why was her friend acting like Rizzo all of a sudden?

Luckily, she was saved when Danny popped into the room yelling: "More soap! More soap! More soap! More soap! More soap!"

The two girls looked confused. _Soap? Why soap?_

However, Frenchy motioned for the boy to sit down on her bed like a good little boy. ((A/N: Danny a good little boy? ROFLMAO!))

Danny did as asked and plopped himself down on Frenchy's bed, hoping to be rewarded with a stash of lemon-scented soap. Instead, the chestnut-haired girl pulled out a metal case from under her bed. The case had the words 'Danger! Sharp Objects- Handle with Care' written across the front. "This should do it!" the girl stated proudly.

Sandy, who has had a phobia of sharp objects ever since that memorable night when the Pink Ladies tried to pierce her ears with a hair pin (different story, 'nother time), immediately went light-headed as soon as she saw the label. Seconds later, she fainted.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Danny yelled and dived for the girl in an attempt to try to catch her. But he accidentally slammed into her too hard and knocked the living daylights out of her. "AAAAAUGH!" he screamed and jumped back. "SHE'S GOING TO GO TO BUNNITOPIA, HECK FOR THE EASTER BUNNIES!"

Anyways, while Danny was busy having a conniption about selling his girlfriend's soul to the Satan Bunny, Frenchy took out a bunch of needles from her metal case and started polishing them carefully.

Danny turned around and saw Frenchy's needles...and started screaming like a little girl. The chestnut-haired girl reacted by jabbing a tattooing needle into the boy's rear end, causing him to scream louder.

Well, the boy screamed so loud that he woke his girlfriend from her unconscious state. The blonde girl started shrieking like heck, causing the chestnut-haired girl to start screeching too.

From experience, I can tell you that three teenage kids screaming their lungs out at the same time is not a pretty sound. Especially if the three teenage kids are good singers, which in this case is true.

So, sooner or later, Frenchy's mother became bothered by all the noise and came charging up the stairs like a mad bull yelling: "INSERT-FRENCHY'S-REAL-NAME-HERE! WHAT'S ALL THAT NOISE?"

OK, hold on a sec. If you will go up a few paragraphs, you'll notice that I said the Pink Ladies tried to Sandy's ears with a hair pin. Well, I've just been informed that only Frenchy tried to pierce Sandy's ears with a hair pin. The Pink Ladies were just in the background giggling their heads off. Anyways, onward!

Well, Sandy and Frenchy stopped screaming as soon as they heard the angry bull's battle cry, but caffeinated Danny continued screaming like a little girl.

And the mad bull barged into the chestnut-haired girl's room, nearly knocking the door out of its hinges, yelling: "WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?"

Danny stopped screaming, glanced at Frenchy's mother for a second, and started screeching again.

Of course, the mad bull didn't get mad at the guest. Instead, she got mad at her daughter. "INSERT-FRENCHY'S-REAL-NAME-HERE! WHY ON EARTH IS MR. ZUCKO IN YOUR ROOM SCREAMING LIKE A MORON? I THOUGHT ONLY THE AUSTRALIAN GIRL WAS COMING OVER! WHY DID SHE BRING MR. ZUCKO ALONG? WAS HE TRYING TO RAPE YOU OR SOMETHING? OH THANK GOD I WAS HERE TO-"

Upon hearing the word 'rape', Sandy turned as white as a sheet and fainted. However, this time, Danny, thinking she was a bar of peach-scented soap, actually managed to catch her.

And the three simply waited for Frenchy's mother to finish her paroxysm. Eventually, the mad women ran out of breath and went downstairs to take an aspirin.

"Now Mr. Zucko," the chestnut-haired girl began as soon as her mother had left, "we're going to need to give you a few shots."

"SHOTS?" Danny exclaimed with horror, causing the comatose girl in his arms to snap out of her unconscious state and leap onto the bed. "I DON'T WANNA GET A FRIKKIN SH-"

But the chestnut-haired girl was too fast for the boy. She stabbed a sewing needle into his arm before he could complete his rant.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!" the boy screamed and shot in the air, bumping his head on the ceiling fan.

"OHMIGOD!" he yelped when the fan came crashing down on him, squashing him flat. Frenchy took this as a chance to stick more needles into the poor caffeinated boy. The boy yelled a profanity every time the girl prodded another needle into his skin.

After about 15 minutes, Frenchy had stabbed every needle she owned into the poor boy's skin. The girl angrily mumbled something about how poking the boy full of sharp objects didn't help his caffeine disorder at all.

On the other hand, Danny's voice had gone hoarse after yelling so many loud swear words.

But where was Sandy all this time? Well, after Danny yelled one profanity too many, she had passed out for the 3rd time, luckily this time on a soft surface.

But, little do we know it, something terrible was happening at the moment...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cliffy! Whee! Oh yeah, and forget about the 5 review thing. No one's going to review this story anyway. I'm just writing it for fun, right?

Sorry it's soooooooooo long. I'll make the next one shorter.


	4. Reboot! In Script Form!

Chapter 4: Reboot! In Script Form!

A random purple magical fairy pops out of nowhere...

Magical Fairy: Yeah, well, as we remember from the last chapter...something really bad is happening right now...

Danny: ((desperately crawls around)) Running...low...on...caffeine...must...have...coffee...

Magical Fairy: Yep, Danny's running low on caffeine. And if he runs out, THE STORY CANNOT GO ON!

--Beethoven's 4th plays--

Sandy: But if he runs out, wouldn't that be a good thing?

Magical Fairy: NO! Now shut up and let me think! ((mumbles)) Stupid Australian brat would see the bright side of a train wreck...

Rizzo: You need me to take care of Miss Goody-goody for ya?

Magical Fairy: Por favor... ((continues thinking about how to re-caffeinate Danny))

Danny: Must...have...coffee...can't...go...on...without...coffee...

Rizzo: ((pulls out whistle)) Ohhhhhh...TOM!

Tom (that jock dude): ((pops in)) Ooh, is it hot in here or is it just me?

Rizzo: Tom, you ex is in here!

Tom: SANDY! ((pounces on Sandy))

Sandy: Get off of me, you son of a-!

Frenchy: Would everyone PLEASE get the hell out of my room?

Magical Fairy: Would you please shut the hell up? I'm trying to think!

Frenchy: Get out of my room first!

Danny: Must...have...coffee...will...die...without...coffee...

A neon yellow leprechaun pops in and transports all Grease characters to the Australian Outback...

Sandy: Yay! Now I can go home!

Tom: No, we're just farther away from home. Rydell!

Sandy: You twit! THIS is my home. Haven't you been listening to me?

Tom: This...desert place...is your home...?

Sandy: No, but it's my country.

Danny: Must...have...coffee...going...to...die...without...coffee...almost...no...caffeine...left...

Frenchy: I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.

Rizzo: That line is copyrighted, kid!

Danny: The...end...is...near...

Suddenly...out of nowhere appears...A GIANT VAT OF COFFEE!

Danny: Coffee...I...see...coffee...must...get...to...coffee... ((desperately crawls to coffee vat))

All of a sudden, the Incredible Hulk appears out of nowhere, picks Danny up by his scruff, and tosses him in the giant coffee vat.

Tom: The Incredible Hulk saves the day again! Hip hip hoo-

Rizzo: ((slaps Tom silly))

Danny: ((swims around in coffee)) WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BUNGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! ((slurps up all the coffee in the giant vat)) YUMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Magical Fairy: ((pops in)) Yes yes! It worked!

Danny: FIGARO FIGARO FIGARO FIGAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Magical Fairy: Yeah, and hiring the Incredible Hulk for the job wasn't cheap.

Sandy: Where did you get all that coffee? AAACK!!! Tom you pervert! Get your hands away from my...!

Magical Fairy: Do you really wanna know where I got all that coffee? Well, I employed evil psycho pink-and-purple pony princess pixies to rob Starbucks HQ of every drop of coffee they had. Evil psycho pink-and-purple pony princess pixies are our friends!

Tom: No, big blue banana-eating bunnies that look like bulimic bears are our friends!

Danny: PANCAKES, WAFFLES, AND SAUSAGES...OH MY!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Review, por favor! Or the story cannot go on!

Danny: WITH A BANJO ON MY KNEE! AND A PIANO ON MY HEAD! AND A TRUMPET UP MY-

Magical Fairy: We don't need to know. --;


	5. The Pizzeria, the Chimera, and the Brit

Chapter 5: In Which Sandy Encounters Sexual Bullies and Danny is Strangled by Pepperoni Pizza

A/N: Thank you thank you thank you ALL for all those coolio reviews!

Disclaimer: Parasite aliens and Chimera-anima are owned by Kish, Pie, Tart, and Mia Ikumi. (Sorry, I just had to put those in here!)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As we recall from the last chapter, Danny has been fully caffeinated once again, much to Sandy's disapproval.

Alright, so after Danny had been rebooted, a neon purple leprechaun transported Danny and Sandy from the Land of Aus (haha bad joke) back to Rydell, CA. Sadly, the leprechaun left all the other Grease characters to sizzle in the boiling Australian Outback.

"PIZZA!" Danny screamed as soon as he and is girlfriend arrived back on the streets of Rydell. "I WANNA PIZZA!"

"Danny, we don't even know where we are," said sensible Sandy. "Shouldn't we try to find our way firs-"

"I...WANNA...PIZZA!"

"Alright, alright."

So the two wandered around in the streets until they came across a little pizzeria called Luigi's Pizza. Danny grabbed hold of Sandy's wrist and pulled her inside.

A very...umm...skimpily-dressed girl greeted the two at the door. "Welcome to Luigi's Pizza..." she said in a sexy voice and started toying with Danny's hair. "However...I'm more interested in you... My name's Lauren (roflmao inside joke)..."

Danny immediately fell head-over-heels for this Hooter's-waitress-like girl. However, Sandy wasn't impressed. She cleared her throat.

Lauren stopped playing with Danny's hair. "Why, you must be his girlfriend..." she cooed at Sandy. "You're pretty cute too..."

Sandy mentally screamed bloody murder. _What the devil is going on? _Of course, since this was the 50s, bisexuality was pretty uncommon. Then there's the fact that Sandy is very naïve and impressionable.

Just then, a tall, dark, and handsome guy walked in and pecked Lauren on the cheek. "Hello hello hello!" he said to Sandy and Danny with a strong British accent. Then he glanced downward at Sandy. "Hello, sweetheart..." he said to her, trying to sexy-fy his voice.

Sandy pinched herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming. _This isn't happening! A showy bisexual AND a creepy British guy in just one little pizza restaurant!_

"Is something the matter, sweetheart?" the British guy cooed. Then, he abruptly leaned over poor Sandy and tried to french her.

"AAAAAAAUGH!" Sandy shrieked, but her screams were quickly muffled when the British guy stuck his tongue in her mouth.

Danny, on the other hand, was busy having fun with Lauren. But if I describe what they were doing, this story would have to be rated MA, so...we'll leave out the details.

"What are you doing? This is a pizza restaurant, not a geisha bar!" Sandy shrieked. She was quickly interrupted when the creepy British dude shoved his tongue back in her mouth. So, our bold Australian heroine did what any girl in this situation would do: she bit down HARD on that British guy's tongue and high-tailed it outta there. All the while, she was thinking:_ This is all Danny's fault!_

"You won't get away with this, stupid Aussie!" the creepy British dude yelled. He then pulled out a jelly-fish-like creature and a slice of pepperoni pizza.

Danny quickly pulled his... umm... thingy... out of Lauren's... well... he quickly turned his attention away from Lauren. "OMFG! IT'S A FRIGGIN PARASITE ALIEN!" he yelled at the top of his lungs.

Well... you know the drill. If you don't, go watch Tokyo Mew Mew.

"FUSION!" the creepy British dude yelled at the top of his lungs. Immediately afterwards, a giant pepperoni pizza charged after our bold Aussie heroine. Fortunately, she was already running at full speed down the street, so the giant pizza gave up and attacked Danny instead.

"PIZZA!" the caffeinated boy yelled at the top of his lungs. He body-slammed the huge pizza and started taking huge bites out of it. "YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY IN MY TUMMY!"

The creepy British dude cursed out loud about his latest Chimera-anima being destroyed by a mere human.

Moments later, the front door to Luigi's Pizza was kicked open. A squad of policemen showed themselves. "Wtf is a giant pizza doing here?" one of the policemen asked.

Amid the large bodies of the policemen, our bold Aussie heroine popped out. "It's you!" she stated and pointed to the creepy British guy.

"What?" the creepy British guy demanded. "It wasn't me! It was you, stupid Aussie! You were the one who brought these damn policemen to my pizza shop!" Then, realizing what he had just said, he quickly covered his mouth. "Oops..."

"Excuse me, son?" the tallest policemen inquired the creepy British guy. "Might we be those 'damn policemen' you speak of?"

Well... instead of watching the creepy British guy being beaten up by officers of the law, let's go check on Danny, shall we?

"LALALALALAAAAA! PIZZA! PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZAZZ!" the caffeinated boy screamed while swimming in the giant pizza (if that is at all possible).

Our Aussie heroine had somehow managed to squeeze through the door and get to her caffeinated boyfriend. "C'mon Danny, let's go!" she hissed and dragged him out the back door of Luigi's Pizza.

"HEY! I WAS JUST GETTING TO DA GOOD PART!" the caffeinated-boy screamed.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Heh heh... sorry this took soooooooooo long to get up here! n.n'

Again, thank you for all the reviews!

Danny: PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA! LOOK FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER IN OUR MONTHLY SPECIA-

((whacks Danny with a cricket bat))


	6. Bonus Chapter 1

Bonus Chapter: The Caffeinated Boy Meets Noelle the Sexy and Karen the Not-Very-Sexy

A/N: I have always been a fan of anime, especially ones in the maho-shojo genre. So here I have a bonus chapter in which the caffeinated boy hangs out with the "polar-twins" from Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch- Karen and Noelle.

IMPORTANT: IF YOU ARE UNFAMILIAR WITH MERMAID MELODY, I SUGGEST YOU SKIP THIS CHAPTER.

Disclaimer: All things related to Mermaid Melody are owned by Hanamori Pink.

Clarification: This is NOT a Karen/Noelle bashing fic! They're actually my favorite mermaids. I wouldn't write about them if I hated them. So GET LOST all Karen/Noelle haters!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a fine day in the Alternative Universe of Doremi Ichigo's story, "High on Coffee". A caffeinated boy sat on a rock near the seashore. He was singing one of his favorite caffeinated songs. Actually, 'singing' is an understatement. More like 'yelling'...

"JINGLE BELLS JINGLE BELLS JINGLE ALL DA WAY! OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE IN A ONE HORSE OPEN SLEIGH! HEY!"

Meanwhile, several hundred feet beneath the surface of the ocean, a certain purple-haired mermaid was not exactly happy with the caffeinated boy's singing. "Uggh! WHAT is that NOISE?" she complained. "If it doesn't stop, I'm going to have to take matters into my own hands!" This spunky lil mermaid, as we should know, is none other than Karen, AKA Purple Pearl Voice.

A blue-haired mermaid swam beside Karen. "Yes, what is it? Perhaps a human singing?" This sensible blue-haired mermaid, as we should know, is none other than Noelle, AKA Aiiro Pearl Voice and Karen's twin sister.

"That's why humans should NEVER sing!" Karen yelled. "It sounds like crap!"

"Calm down, Karen-chan," Noelle suggested to her twin while clasping her own hands over her own ears. However, telling Karen to calm down was pretty much like telling a monsoon not to get anything wet. In other words... it's just simply impossible.

"Noelle-chan, it's strange enough that you can remain calm during all this... this... SCREECHING!" Karen snapped. "But now you expect ME to stay calm?"

"Karen, please..."

"AAAAAUGH! I can't STAND this!" Karen yelled. "I'm gonna go up to the surface and give that human a piece of my mind!"

"No, Karen!"

Hot-headed Karen grabbed Noelle's arm andswam up to the surface.

"Not so fast!" levelheaded Noelle cautioned her hot-blooded sister. "It'd be best if humans didn't see us in our mermaid forms!"

The purple-haired mermaid stopped swimming in mid-stroke. "Oh yeah... didn't think of that..."

The blue-haired mermaid sighed. "You usually don't think..." she mumbled under her breath.

The two mermaids swam into a hidden inlet and transformed into their human forms. Then they just followed their ears, hoping to find the source of the terrible human singing.

"Hey Noelle, what's a 'jingle bell'?" Karen asked her sister while they were walking.

"I don't know," Noelle answered. "You've spent more time as a human than I have."

Several moments later, both mermaids came to an abrupt halt when they saw the source of the horrible singing.

"What is THAT?" Karen inquired in a disgusted way, specifying the "singing" caffeinated boy. "It looks like a monkey dressed in black leather!"

"Well, why don't you try to tell him to stop," Noelle suggested.

"No way!" Karen snapped. "You go!"

"Umm... you know, Karen-chan... you've always been the more daring one... why don't you go?" Noelle suggested in her talk-not-fight way.

"Alright alright!" Karen grumbled, roughly pushing Noelle behind a large rock. The purple-haired girl then confidently strutted up to the singing boy. "HEY YOU!" she yelled and pointed her index finger right at him.

The caffeinated boy immediately stopped singing as soon as he was addressed by the purple-haired girl. "OOOOOH SEXY GIRL!" he exclaimed.

Several feet away, Noelle sweatdropped from behind her large rock. She had never thought Karen was sexy. Pretty, maybe, but not SEXY.

Karen, on the other hand, did an anime fall, banging her head on purpose to make sure she wasn't dreaming. To be called sexy by a guy was a great honor for the purple-haired girl. Then she realized exactly WHO called her sexy. "HEY! Who the heck are you?" she demanded. "And how DARE you say I'm sexy? You don't even know me yet!"

The boy glanced up at Karen. "OH HELL NO NOT YOU! YOU'RE TOO FRIKKIN PURPLE!" he screeched. Then he pointed at Noelle, who was watching tentatively from behind her large rock. "I MEAN HER!"

"WHAAAAAAT?" Karen raged. She had never thought Noelle was sexy. Pretty, maybe, but not sexy.

The caffeinated boy sprang up from the rock he was sitting on. "OOOOH BABY BABY I'M COMIN 4 U!" he yelled and started running towards Noelle.

As soon as the blue-haired girl saw the wild boy running towards her, she immediately started running towards the ocean. As soon as she was close enough to the water, she dove in.

Naturally, the caffeinated boy followed the "sexy girl" and dove into the water too. Several minutes later, he was able to catch up with the blue-haired girl. However, as we should've been able to predict, she was no longer a girl...

"OMFG YOU'RE A FRIKKIN MERMAID!" the boy screamed, almost loud enough for the world to hear.

Noelle, however, thinking that the boy was some kind of monster, transformed into Aiiro Pearl Voice and got ready to sing. She had been captured once, and she wasn't going to let that happen again! Imagine having to spend months and months unconscious in a glass tube! Not something you'd wanna do more than once!

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH SEXY POP-STAR MERMAID!" the caffeinated boy shouted, this time loud enough for the world to hear. This, of course, attracted a lot of attention...

Tens of thousands of guys around the world heard this shout and immediately came pouring into the waters of this little beach. (How they got there... I don't know...) All wanted to see the "sexy pop-star mermaid".

Noelle was shocked by this. She immediately transformed back into a mermaid and high-tailed it outta there, with thousands of hopeful guys from Albania, Zimbabwe, and everywhere in between hot on her tail.

The blue-haired mermaid did not scream. She did not shout. She just kept swimming, just kept swimming, just kept swimming, swimming, swimming...

Meanwhile, back on shore, Karen was showing off some wild karate moves to the caffeinated boy, on behalf of her dear twin sister being in danger... AGAIN. "Take that! And that! And that! And that!" the purple-haired girl yelled while throwing wild punches and kicks at the boy.

Suddenly, there was a HUGE flash of blinding white light coming from the ocean. Several seconds later, Noelle's voice rang throughout the air. "Aiiro Pearl Voice!" she shouted, followed by: "Pichi Pichi Pitch... LIVE START!"

Karen abruptly stopped trying to kill the caffeinated boy. She realized what was going on. Noelle was going to try to sing to stun the boys chasing after her. But most importantly, she was going to try to sing by herself. Karen worried that her sister's singing would not be strong enough to stun so many boys. The purple-haired girl bit her fingernails and muttered some Japanese curses that are best left untranslated.

Meanwhile, several hundred feet under the ocean, many of the multi-national boys had passed out from being under water for so long. But the ones who were still conscious waited for the "sexy pop-star mermaid" to start singing.

Noelle decided to sing "Kodou", her favorite song to sing with Karen and the rest of the mermaids. "Arashi no umi ni utarete makesou na ima wo," she sang as loud as she could. Several of the multi-national boys were knocked-out after this first line. Others felt light-headed and dizzy.

In the meantime, back on the shore, Karen fumed and fussed. "Kodou is the song that all seven of us always sing TOGETHER!" she cried. "Noelle-chan can't possibly sing it by herself!"

"SING?" the caffeinated boy yelled. "I LOVE TO SING! LALALALA! LALALALA! ELMO'S WORLD!"

Karen immediately slammed her hands over her ears and screamed out in horror and rage. "STOP SINGING!" she cried. "AND WHO THE HECK IS ELMO?"

The caffeinated boy ignored the enraged purple-haired girl. "ELMO LOVES HIS GOLDFISH! HIS CRAYON TOO!"

"SHUT UP, WOULD YOU?" Karen screeched. "I'll say this again! Humans should NEVER sing!"

The caffeinated boy automatically zipped it after the purple-haired girl had said that last line. "But you're a human!" he exclaimed.

Karen did an anime fall. "Well... let's just put it this way... I'm not what you think..."

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! SO YOU'RE A SEXY POP-STAR MERMAID TOO?" the boy inquired. Then he added: "WELL U CAN'T POSSIBLY BE AS SEXY AS DAT OTHER SEXY POP-STAR MERMAID!"

Now, instead of watching a caffeinated boy getting beaten-up by a purple-haired Japanese girl, let's switch back to Noelle, shall we? Well, it turned out that her singing WAS strong enough, after all. After the blue-haired idol had only finished singing the fourth line of Kodou, all of the multi-national boys had passed out. Seeing this, she had transformed back into a mermaid and was now on her way back to the surface.

Moments later, the blue-haired mermaid stepped onto land and transformed into her human form. What greeted her return was surely a sight to see...

The caffeinated boy lay in the sand, his clothes ripped, his body limp, and his nose bleeding. Little stars and planets circled rapidly around his forehead. Karen stood nearby, proudly flashing a V-for-Victory sign.

"Karen-chan, what happened?" Noelle worriedly questioned.

"Nothing, sis!" Karen answered. "Just demonstrating a few karate moves to Mr. Rude-and-Annoying here!"

"Oh... I see..."

However, the caffeinated boy was not completely unconscious. He actually managed to yell a bit of caffeinated randomness before he completely went out cold.

These were his last words, accompanied by the sounds of Karen and Noelle sweatdropping:

"DID SOMEONE ORDER AN ANCHOVY CALZONE?"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yay! Our first bonus chapter! Hope all Mermaid Melody fans (if there are any here!) enjoyed that!

Here's a game for you! Estimate how many tranquilizers Noelle takes per day. I think at least five. And that's how many reviews I have to receive before I post the chapter! Five! (Ppl plez... I only have five reviews now...)

Everyone likes the story so far! That's a good sign! However, if you didn't like the story, please give me some constructive criticism.

Please review! And if you liked this story, please ask your friends to read it and review! Gracias!


	7. Bonus Chapter 2

Bonus Chapter 2: Noelle the Sexy, Karen the Loco-Coco, Coco's Pudding, and Pudding the Jello

A/N: Another Bonus! This time, it features Karen, Noelle, and Coco from Mermaid Melody, and Pudding Fon from Tokyo Mew Mew. If you are unfamiliar with these two anime or these characters, I highly recommend that you skip this chapter.

Caution: Some KarenXNoelle shojo-ai.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's a rainy day in the Alternative Universe of Doremi Ichigo's story, "High on Coffee". Our caffeinated hero sat inside a waterfront house, hiding from the rain. With him were two teenage girls, one with long purple hair and the other with long blue hair. These two girls, as we should know, are none other than Karen and Noelle, polar-twins from Mermaid Melody.

The caffeinated boy sighed. Sitting inside was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo boring. The two girls he was with were making quite a racket, especially the purple-haired one. He glanced at the two girls and immediately turned away. "AAAAAIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! SHOJO-AI!" he shrieked. "SHOJO-AI SHOJO-AI SHOJO-AI SHOJO-AI SHOJO-AI!"

Karen immediately stopped hugging her sister. "SHUT UP!" she yelled at the boy. "CAN'T WE HAVE A LITTLE QUIET TIME?"

"BUT GIRLS SHOULDN'T DO THAT TO EACH OTHER! YOU'RE A BAD INFLUENCE FOR A YOUNG IMPRESSIONABLE LITTLE BOY LIKE ME!"

"SO? WE'RE SISTERS! CAN'T WE SHOW A LITTLE SISTERLY LOVE?"

It was Noelle's turn to sigh. It was impossible to have a little quiet time when a caffeinated boy and a short-tempered girl are together in the same room.

Anyways, what exactly WERE Karen and Noelle doing? What could possibly make our caffeinated hero so mad? Let's roll the tape back a little, shall we?

----------------------------------------------------

It had just started raining in the Alternative Universe of Doremi Ichigo's story, "High on Coffee". Short-tempered Karen and level-headed Noelle sat very close to each other inside a waterfront house, hiding from the rain. With them was a black-haired boy who had had too much coffee.

Karen sighed. Hiding from the rain was very boring. She glanced at her sister, who was sitting no more than an inch away from her. Her darling twin sister. Suddenly, a thousand memories came back to her. Memories of tears, of pain, of hurt, but most of all, memories of loss. Loss of the most important thing in her life: her twin sister, Noelle. But now, Noelle was found. Found... and alive.

The purple-haired girl couldn't take it anymore. "NOELLE!" she abruptly screamed and embraced her sister in a tight hug. "Noelle... Noelle... Noelle..." Karen repeated her sister's name over and over, savoring each one like sugar on her tongue. Then, the purple-haired girl squeezed her sister tighter. She buried her face in her sister's long blue locks. Tears slipped from her honey-colored eyes. "Noelle!" the purple-haired girl cried once again. "I'll never let go of you, dear sister. Never ever ever..."

Noelle understood what was going on. "Karen..." she whispered delicately. "I'm here... please, don't worry..." Tears also slipped out of the blue-haired girl's cerulean eyes.

The two girls continued crying and hugging each other until they were interrupted by a loud shriek...

----------------------------------------------------

And we are back to where we were...

Haha, anxious readers! I have proved you all wrong! I CAN write angst! Muahahahaha! I have proved my strength! Ahem...

So, after Karen and the caffeinated boy finished screaming at each other... there was a loud knock at the door...

"I SHALL GET IT!" our caffeinated hero screamed and dashed to the door. He flung it open, only to find a soaked blonde girl.

"Please..." the blonde begged. "It's raining... so could you spare me a little shelter?"

The caffeinated boy didn't say yes. Yet, he didn't say no. He just stood there, dazed, staring at the girl.

Karen and Noelle, however, automatically recognized who the blonde was. "COCO!" Noelle blissfully screamed at once and dashed to the door to accommodate her friend.

Karen sighed. It had always seemed to her as if there was always someone who was way too close to her sister. First Lina... and just recently Coco was added to the list... The purple-haired girl growled. Coco was... bearable, at best... but Lina was insufferable! Just thinking about the emerald-haired girl was nauseating! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAACK! STUPID STUPID LINA! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOUR GUTS! STAY AWAY FROM NOELLE, YOU... YOU...!"

Upon Karen's explosion, Coco automatically leaped into Noelle's arms. The blue-haired girl caught her friend and sighed. Some things never change...

Our caffeinated hero, however, immediately took Karen's sudden outburst the wrong way. "OOOOOOH! OOOOOOOOOH! THAT LOOKS LIKE FUN! LEMME TRY! LEMME TRY!" he yelled. "I HATE YOU, STUPID TOM! STUPID STUPID TOM! YOU TOUCHED MY ORANGES! AND PULLED MY BANANA! AND POKED MY APPLE!"

Noelle's lively mind quickly realized what the caffeinated boy was talking about. She was so shocked she let go of Coco.

The caffeinated boy continued ranting. "TOM, YOU ARE A LOCO-COCO-IN-A-POCO!" He paused for a second, and then quickly added: "AND SO ARE YOU, YOU NON-SEXY PURPLE MERMAID PERSON! YOU ARE ALSO A LOCO-COCO!"

Without further ado, Karen's short temper got the best of her. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?" she erupted. "WHADYA MEAN I'M A LOCO-COCO?" She paused for a second to catch her breath, and then continued: "COCO'S THE REAL LOCO-COCO!"

Poor Coco was so surprised she wet her pants, causing Noelle to perform her rare action of panicking. But let's cut to the chase...

Unfortunately-but-fortunately, the caffeinated boy didn't exactly hear the purple-haired girl's tirade. He was too busy singing "You're too sexy" to Noelle...

When Karen heard the boy singing, she had another conniption. "HEY! I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY FROM HER! AND STOP SINGING! HUMANS SHOULD NEVER SING! NOELLE'S GONNA GO DEAF IF YOU CONTINUE YOUR HORRIBLE SCREECHING!"

Noelle, who was used to Karen's over-protectiveness, sighed. "C'mon, Coco," she said to her friend. "Let's go get you some dry clothes."

Strangely, Coco refused to go with Noelle. "Pudding..." she stated in a dazed tone. "Pudding... pudding... I want pudding..."

Noelle looked confused. "Pudding? Why do you want pudding?"

Coco didn't answer the blue-haired girl's question. Instead, she continued repeating the word 'pudding' in that same dazed tone. "Pudding... pudding... pudding..."

Noelle sighed again and walked into the kitchen in search for a cup of pudding. When she opened the fridge, she was met by a big surprise. There were all kinds of pudding inside: plum pudding, bread pudding, Mew Pudding... but she wasn't sure if this was the kind of pudding Coco wanted. Wait... _Mew Pudding_?

"KONNICHIWA NOELLE-ONEE-CHAN NA NO DA! I'M FON PUDDING, AGE 9!" Mew Pudding yelled in the blue-haired girl's face moments after she opened the fridge.

Noelle was taken aback. She quickly slammed the fridge door shut and pinched herself about a thousand times to make sure she wasn't dreaming.

However, several seconds later, the door flung open again and Pudding leaped onto Noelle. "AAAAAIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF!" the blue-haired girl screamed, and then started coughing violently as a side-effect for raising her never-raised voice.

Upon hearing Noelle's scream, Karen ran into the room, ready to rescue her sister from whatever it was that was troubling her.

Pudding, however, immediately let go of Noelle and leaped onto Karen instead, scaring the heck out of the purple-haired girl.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! BLOODY MURDER BLOODY MURDER BLOODY MURDER BLOODY MURDER BLOODY MURDER!" Karen screamed and started running circles around the kitchen like a headless chicken. Pudding, however, who has an amazingly-strong grip, managed to hold onto the crazed teenager and actually enjoy the ride!

Upon hearing the screams, the caffeinated boy dashed into the room. He quickly noted the small blonde girl riding on the distraught purple-haired girl and wanted to join in the fun.

Pretty soon, Karen had two riders clinging onto her. This didn't cause her to slow down at all; in fact she ran even faster!

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY HORSEY! GIDDYUP HORSEY!" our caffeinated hero yelled while grasping tightly onto Karen's long purple hair.

After about half an hour of running in circles around the kitchen at 70 mph, Karen finally managed to swing both riders off her back. By then, she was very tired. She went light-headed and started to collapse... RIGHT ON TOP OF PUDDING!

"AAAAAACK!" Karen yelped, but she was soon met by a surprise. The landing was amazingly... soft. There were no sounds of bones being crushed... only a 'B-BOING!" noise. Weird...

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!" the caffeinated boy exclaimed. "JELLO! BOUNCY JELLO! BOUNCY-WOUNCY JELLO!"

Karen looked confused. "Huh? Jello? What're you talking about?"

Pudding stood up and giggled. "I'M EXTRA-BOUNCY NA NO DA! JUST LIKE JELLO NA NO DA!"

The caffeinated boy gasped. "PUDDING... IS... JELLO!" he screamed.

"PUDDING IS JELLO NA NO DA!" the monkey-girl exclaimed. "I like the sound of that na no da!"

"Then where's my pudding?" Coco asked.

Noelle sighed. _What is up with Coco? _ She opened up the fridge again, pulled out a random chocolate pudding, and handed it to her blonde friend.

Just then, the caffeinated boy popped in. "PUDDING DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING THAT CAN MAKE ME BOUNCY-WOUCY?"

Pudding pulled out a pill from her pocket. "You can use this!" she exclaimed. "This pill has been passed down through the Fon Family for generations! It's called 'Bouncy-Wouncy' and has a high content of caffeine!"

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!" the boy yelled. He snatched the pill from the girl and swallowed it.

Several minutes later, the newly-caffeinated boy was literally bouncing off the walls and driving everyone, even Pudding, nuts.

And our story has come to an end. So... THE END.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Review, por favor! Flames will be used to fry bacon and eggs.


	8. The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything!

Top of Form

Chapter 6: Danny and Tom, the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything! In Script Form!

A/N: Zippidy doo-dah! I have updated! ((plays didgeridoo in joy)) Sorry, sorry, so sorry for not updating in, like, forever! n.n'

Oh yeah, and I'll start working on this story a little more now, hopefully. (I've been spending all of my time on Xanga lately.)

Also, sorry for the misconception... this story shall NEVER end! As long as human beings on Planet Earth continue to consume coffee, this story will go on! We must let the world witness the true power of caffeine!

((crickets chirp))

Danny, that's your cue.

Danny: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Ahem... I do not own the following lyrics. They belong to Veggie Tales. No money is being made out of this; this is for pure enjoyment only.

And I apologize for any OOC-ness, particularly on Narrator Rizzo's part.

And I do not know any of the Grease characters. The only person I own is Sandy's Interpreter.

Also, I must warn you: If Sandy is your favorite character, don't read this.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A random orange magical fairy, obviously a relative of the random purple magical fairy from Chapter 4, pops out of nowhere and hands Rizzo a microphone.

Rizzo: Crap! Am I the narrator?

Magical Fairy: Yes!

Rizzo: OK... Joining... our... highly... caffeinated... boy, Danny... is... Tom...

Magical Fairy: No no no! Put some more UMPH into it!

Rizzo: Joining our highly caffei-

Magical Fairy: More UMPH!

Rizzo: Joiningourhighlycaffeina-

Magical Fairy: MORE UMPH! C'MON! U CAN DO IT!

Rizzo: JOININGOURHIGHLYCAFFEINATEDBOYDANNYISTOM...

Magical Fairy: OO' Uhh... Less umph...

Rizzo: WHYDIDNTYOUJUSTSAYSO! Joining our highly caffeinated boy, Danny, is Tom Whatever-his-last-name-is-I-forgot-a-long-time-ago-but-if-you-really-wanna-know-go-ask-Miss-Goody-Goody. Together, they make up the infamous duo of scallywags, the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything!

Danny: WE ARE THE PIRATES WHO DON'T DO ANYTHING!

Rizzo: ((whaps Danny with rolled-up newspaper)) NOT! YET! First... our mission!

((drumroll...))

Sandy: ((is tied to a chair with her mouth duct-taped and her arms tied behind her back)) MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMN MMMMMMN MMMMMMN MMMMMMN MMMMMMMMMMN MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH!

Interpreter: Let me go! Danny, I know you'll come rescue me because that's what a real gentleman would do! Danny, help me!

Rizzo: ((cackles manically)) Our ultimate mission is to launch our little friend into outer space! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! But... unfortunately... since that's impossible... we'll just do whatever we can do with her.

Danny: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Sandy: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNNMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMMMNNNNNNNPH!

Interpreter: LET ME GO!

Rizzo: ((cackles manically again)) Ahem... anyways...

Danny: WE ARE THE PIRATES WHO DON'T DO ANYTHING!

Tom: ...

Rizzo: ((whaps Tom with cricket bat)) SING, YOU NINCOMPOOP!

Danny, Tom: WE ARE THE PIRA-

Rizzo: HOLD IT! Ahem... Fanfiction has a new rule. No misusing capital letters!

Danny: WHAAAAAAAT?

Rizzo: That means you can't sing in capital letters. TOM! MUFFLE HIM!

Tom: ((wraps giant muffler around Danny))

Danny: Mmmph! Mommy!

Rizzo: Yes! We have disabled his capitalized-singing-and-yelling ability! Lights! Camera! Action!

Danny, Tom: We are the pirates who don't do anything! We just say home and lie around! And if you ask us to do anything... we'll just tell you...

Tom: We don't do anything! Well... I've... never been to Greenland, and I've never been to Denver, and I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul. And I've never been to Moscow, and I've never been to Tampa, and I've never been to Boston in the fall!

Sandy: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMMN MMMMMMPH MMMMMMNN MMMMMMMNNPH!

Interpreter: Tom, stop lying! You have so been to Denver! You told me all about your skiing adventures there!

Rizzo: SHUT UP, MISS GOODY-GOODY! It's just a song! Geeezzz!

Sandy: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMMMMNNN! MMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNN!

Interpreter: Where's St. Paul and St. Louie? Danny told me it was pronounced "St. Louis"! And where's Tampa?

Rizzo: SHUT. UP. Stupid Australian!

Danny, Tom: 'Cuz we're the pirates who don't do anything! We just stay home and lie around! And if you ask us to do anything... we'll just tell you...

Tom: We don't do anything! Hey... wait a minute... how come I have two solos in a row?

Rizzo: 'Cuz that's how we planned it...

Tom: But I don't wanna sing two solos in a row! There are too many people staring at me...

Rizzo: ((whaps Tom with remote-control)) SING, YOU IDIOT!

Tom: AAAAAAAAUGH YES MA'AM! Well... I... never hoist the mainsail, and I never swab the poop deck, and I never veer to starboard 'cuz I never sail at all. And I've never walked the gangplank, and I've never owned a parrot, and I've never been to Boston in the fall! ... However...

Rizzo: What...?

Tom: Sandy did once tell me what it was like to be on board a sailboat!

Danny: Oh yeah? Sandy once told me what it was like to be on board a CRUISE SHIP!

Tom: Oh yeah? Sandy's told me MANY TIMES that she WANTED to take ME on a cruise ship WITH HER!

Sandy: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMMMMNNN MMMMMMMMMNNN MMMMMMMMPH!

Interpreter: I feel so loved... even though, I wouldn't take Tom on a cruise ship even if you paid me a million dollars...

Rizzo: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... CAN WE EVER DO ANYTHING WITHOUT BRINGING UP MISS GOODY-GOODY? I think I'm going to be sick if I hear another word about y'all's undying love for her...!

Tom: Did Rizzo just say "y'all"?

Rizzo: SO WHAT IF I DID? GET ON WITH THE SONG!

Danny, Tom: 'Cuz we're the pirates who don't do anything! We just stay home and lie around! And if you ask us to do anything... we'll just tell you...

Danny: ((rips off giant muffler)) WE DON'T DO ANYTHING!

Rizzo: PUT THAT DAMN MUFFLER BACK ON!

Tom: ((gags Danny with giant muffler))

Danny: ((chokes and coughs violently)) Well... I've... never plucked a rooster, and I'm not too good at ping-pong, and I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against a wall! And I've never kissed a chipmunk, and I've never gotten head lice, and I've never been to Boston in the fall!

Tom: Huh? What're ya talkin' about? What's a rooster and mashed potatoes have to do with being a pirate? We're supposed to sing about pirate-y things!

Danny: Lalalala! Lalalala! Elmo's World!

Tom: And who's ever kissed a chipmunk? That's just nonsense! Why even bring it up? Am I right? What do you think?

Danny: I think you look like Cap'n Crunch.

Tom: WHAT? NO, I DON'T!

Danny: Do too.

Tom: DO NOT!

Danny: You're makin' me hungry...!

Tom: That's it, YOU'RE WALKIN' THE PLANK!

Danny: Says who?

Tom: Says the CAP'N, THAT'S WHO!

Danny: Oh yeah? Aye-aye, Cap'n Crunch!

Tom: WHY YOU LITTLE...!

Danny: Oh yeah? You wanna take this outside? Huh? Huh? Do ya, do ya, do ya?

Tom: YOU ASKED FOR IT, MAN! ((punches Danny in the face))

Danny, Tom: ((start rolling on the ground trying to beat each other up))

Sandy: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMMMMMMNNN MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNN MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPH!

Interpreter: Ahhh... those two can't go a day without beating each other up. I'm sick of it. Why can't we all just be friends?

Rizzo: All of us be... FRIENDS...? Oh gawd... I think I'm gonna hurl...

Tom: DIE! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!

Rizzo: GUYS! GET ON WITH THE SONG!

Danny: ((jumps up from under Tom's elbow)) OK! And... I've... never licked a spark plug, and I've never smelled a stink bug, and I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball! And I've never bathed in yogurt and I don't look good in leggings...

Tom: Idiot! You just don't get it!

Danny: ((raises fists)) You wanna take this outside, man?

Tom: You just got a ticket for a ride on Death Express!

Rizzo: GUYS! FINISH THE DAMN SONG!

Danny, Tom: Andwe'veneverbeentoBostoninthefall! ((start rolling on the ground trying to beat each other up again))

Sandy: MMMMMMMMPH!

Interpreter: The end.

Rizzo: Hey! That was my line! Stupid Australian!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

August 9, 2007 NOTE: I made a few small changes to this chapter that I should've made a long time ago. Enjoy the rest of the story folks! I promise to update this nonsens- I mean STORY- soon!


	9. Rizzo's Got a Water Buffalo!

Chapter 7: Rizzo's Got A Water Buffalo! (In Script Form, cuz I'm lazy!)

A/N: FYI, almost a year has passed since I was in the Grease Jr. musical at our school, and it's been a heck of a long time since I last saw the movie. Let's face it... I completely, utterly, no-doubt-about-it forgot everything that happened in the movie. (The only thing I remember is the Pink Ladies offering Sandy champagne and a cigarette.) So, if some of my facts are wrong, or if the some of the characters are OOC, feel free to tell me. I'd appreciate it.

BTW, in our Grease musical, I was... ((gaaaaaaassssssppppp)) ... Well, I'm not telling until I get at least 5 reviews. (This will really surprise you!)

Disclaimer: I don't own Grease or Veggie Tales.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rizzo: WHAT? What's with the title? Whadya mean I've got a water buffalo?

Sandy: Oh, you don't have your water buffalo yet? ((hands Rizzo water buffalo beanie-baby)) There you go, now you've got a water buffalo!

Rizzo: Geezzz... thanks...

Sandy: You're welcome! Ahem... and now...

Tom: No, wait! First... ((gags Danny with giant muffler))

Danny: No! The repeating capital letters! They're gone... all gone! Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Tom: And now...! Ahem... And now it is time for Silly Songs With Danny, the part of the fanfic where Danny comes out and sings a Silly Song. So without further ado... Silly Songs With Danny.

Danny: Rizzo's got a water buffalo! He runs fast and goes 'Ho ho ho!' Where she got him, I don't know, but Betty Rizzo's got a water buffalo-oooooooooooooo!

Rizzo: ((hands water buffalo beanie-baby to random passerby little kid)) Oh gawwwddd... I think I'm gonna be sick...

Danny: She took her buffalo to the store. Got his head stuck in the door. Spilled some lima beans on the floor... ohhhhhhhhhhh... Rizzo's got a-

((crickets chirp))

Sandy: Umm... Rizzo? You have a line now.

Rizzo: Psshh... make me say it... Stupid Australian...

Frenchy: ((stabs Rizzo's butt with a tattooing needle))

Rizzo: AAAAAAAAAAUGH! OK! OK! I'LL TALK! I'LL TALK!

Sandy: That's better...

Rizzo: ((in British accent)) Stop! Stop! Stop it, what do you think you're doing? You can't say Rizzo's got a water buffalo when Rizzo does NOT have a water buffalo! We're going to get a lot of nasty letters saying 'Where's Rizzo's water buffalo? I don't see Rizzo's water buffalo!' Are you prepared to deal with that? I don't think so! So stop being so SILLY!

((crickets chirp again))

Sandy: Umm... Rizzo, did you just-?

Rizzo: ((in normal voice)) Shut up, I'm allergic to Frenchy's damn tattooing needles... Stupid Australian...!

Sandy: OO' Rizzo, where's the water buffalo I gave you?

Rizzo: I GAVE IT TO SOME RANDOM LITTLE KID, OK? You got a problem with that, Stupid Australian?

Sandy: ((scoots away from Rizzo)) Umm... Tom, the next line is yours.

Tom: Tune in again next time to hear Danny sing...

Danny: Rizzo's got a baby kangaroo! Its butt is pink but its boobs are blue! Its weenie is small but-

Rizzo: ((whacks Danny with lacrosse stick))

Danny: Owwie! Crap, I can't say it in all-capital letters! Crap!

Rizzo: ((whacks Danny again with lacrosse stick))

Danny: Owwie! Waaaaaaahhh... Mommy, she's harassing me...!

Sandy: OO' Umm... Rizzo? You're supposed to end the song by running across the room screaming your lungs out in horror...

Rizzo: I. DON'T. CARE. Stupid Australian...!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Review, por favor! No flames! Again, new ideas would be greatly appreciated!

Sandy: Also, is it just me, or is this the second chapter in a row that's ended with Rizzo calling me a "Stupid Australian"?

It's not just you... '


	10. Danny's Hairbrush!

Chapter 8: Where the Bleep is Danny's Hairbrush? (Isn't everything in Script Form now?) 

A/N: Dude... it's been MORE than a year since I've been in Grease Jr. and just about a year since I've last seen the movie. I don't remember anything about it except for the part where Frenchy was trying to pierce Sandy's ear with a hairpin (I mean, who can possibly forget that memorable moment?). So, either I've got to go watch the movie again OR someone can just fill me in on a brief summary. Nahh, I think I'll go with Choice One.

I'll try not to do anymore Veggie Tales songs. We need some variety, I know.

Disclaimer: I don't own Grease or Veggie Tales. Nuff said.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rizzo: Eugene, you're the narrator this time.

Eugene: OK... ((pushes up glasses)) And now, after downing nine cups of coffee and donning his lovely giant muffler, Danny shall now sing another silly song. This will be his third consecutive Veggie Tales song. But first...

Rizzo: Danny will only let Miss Goody-Goody put his "makeup" on for him...

Sandy: Now hold still, Danny. This won't hurt a bit. ((shaves Danny's head bald with a GIGANTIC razor))

Danny: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauggghhh! It burns, woman, it burns! Omg! The repeating capital letters! They're gone... gone... all gone! Zomg! Ooooh... little black fuzzy things on the floor... it looks like hair!

Sandy: It is hair, silly.

Danny: Cool! Hmm... I wonder whose hair it is! Whoever's hair that is did some major shedding!

Everybody Else: ((cough cough))

Danny: Do y'all need a cough drop?

Sandy: No, we're fine. ((hands Danny a towel)). Now go take all of your clothes off and put this on.

Danny: Yes ma'am! ((takes his pants off)) Look! I have little hearts on my boxers! See? See?

Eugene: Oooh la la! Are those space boxers, 'cause your butt is out of this world!

Sandy: Aaaaaaaaaaugh! No Danny! Do it in the bathroom!

Danny: Whatev. Party pooper.

Eugene: Fifteen minutes later, our curtain opens as Danny, having just finished his morning bath, is searching for his hairbrush. Having no success, Danny cries out while doing the Electric Slide...

Danny: ((sings)) Oh, where is my hairbrush? Oh, where is my hairbrush? Oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh, where... oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh, where... oh, where ... is my hairbrush?

Eugene: Having heard his cry, Kenickie enters the scene. Shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of Danny in a towel, Kenickie regains his composure and reports in a very retarded manner...

Kenickie: I think I saw a hairbrush back there! ((pulls down his pants and moons Danny, pointing to his butt hole))

Danny: Omg! Sexy butt! Wait, my hairbrush is up there? Omg, it's probably, like, covered in, like, crap! Oh well! ((sticks hand up Kenickie's butt))

Kenickie: OMFG! Don't you be touchin' that, boy!

Rizzo: ((whaps Danny with a tennis racket)) Get on with it!

Danny: Ouch! Watch it, lady! ((sings)) Back there is my hairbrush! Back there is my hairbrush! Back there, back there, oh, where, back there, oh, where, oh, where, back there, back there, back there ... is my hairbrush!

Eugene: ((sigh)) Having heard his joyous proclamation, Coach Calhoun enters the scene. Shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of Danny in a towel, Coach Calhoun does NOT regain his composure and yells like a mad wildboar ...

Coach Calhoun: For heaven's sake, why on earth do you need a hairbrush? You don't have any hair, for Pete's sake!

Eugene: Danny is taken aback. The thought had never occurred to him. No hair? What would this mean? What will become of him? What will become of his hairbrush? Danny wonders ...

Danny: Hold up, bro... I'm bald? ((feels the top of his head)) Yeah... you're right... wait a minute... where the –bleep- is my hair?

Sandy: Umm... Danny? You know the little black fuzzy things on the floor that you were talking about earlier? Well...

Danny: Omg.

Sandy: That...

Danny: No.

Sandy: That was actually...

Danny: No way.

Sandy: That was actually... your hair...

Danny: ((gaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssssssssssppp)) My hair? As in Danny Zucko's hair?

Sandy: Yes, as in Danny Zucko's hair.

Danny: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! It can't be! Not my hair! My beautiful hair!

Eugene: ((ahem)) Danny wonders while running around the room like a headless chicken...

Danny: ((sings)) No hair for my hairbrush! No hair for my hairbrush! No hair, no hair, no where, no hair, no hair, no hair, no where, back there, no hair ... for my hairbrush! ((crashes into coffee table)) Ouch! Ay Caramba! Oi!

Eugene: Having heard (and seen) his wonderings, Tom enters the scene. Shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of Danny in a towel, Tom regains his composure and confesses ...

Tom: Danny, that old hairbrush of yours... well, you never use it; you don't really need it. So, well, I'm sorry ... I didn't know. But I gave it to Cha-cha... 'cause she's got hair!

Rizzo: Holy crap, Tom! Whad'you give it to Cha-Cha for?

Tom: Dawg, she be sizzlin' yo!

Eugene: ((cough)) Feeling a deep sense of loss, Danny stumbles back and laments...

Danny: Why the hell did you give it to Cha-Cha? You son of female dog!

Tom: 'Cause I felt like it! It's a free county!

Danny: Why Cha-Cha, damn it!

Eugene: Uhh... Danny, that's not lamenting!

Danny: Hmph! ((sings)) Not fair for my hairbrush! Not fair, my poor hairbrush! Not fair, not fair, no hair, not fair, no where, no hair, not fair, not fair, not fair... my little hairbrush!

Eugene: Having heard his lament, Cha-Cha enters the scene. Herself in a towel, both Danny and Cha-Cha are shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of...each other. But recognizing Danny's generosity, Cha-Cha is thankful... ((wheeze wheeze))

Cha-Cha: Mmm... lookin' good, big boy! Mmm-hmmm... just the way I like it...

Danny: Oooh! Sexy girl! That's the way, uh-huh uh-huh, I like it, uh-huh uh-huh...

Rizzo: Idiot! ((whaps Danny with a pair of loafers)) You're twenty years ahead of the frikkin times! We're in the '50s, not the '70s!

Danny: Ouch! Quit hittin' me, woman!

Cha-Cha: Mmmm... you're cute when you're mad... I like that in guys... Btw, thanks for the hairbrush. But let's not worry about the hairbrush... let's worry about us...

Danny: Yummy! I like the sound of that! Wanna go into the bathroom and do stuff?

Cha-Cha: ((gasp)) You read my mind! Let's go; I wanna see you in action! ((grabs Danny and goes into bathroom))

Rizzo: Keep it clean, guys! This story is only rated Teen!

Sandy: ((sniffle)) Cha-Cha stole Danny away from me again! ((cries uncontrollably))

Frenchy: Uh-oh... I think Cha-Cha made Sandy mad... again...

Rizzo: ((rolls eyes)) Whatever. It's Miss Goody-Goody's fault that she has such sensitive feelings... man, she's such a crybaby... it makes me wanna barf...

Frenchy: Rizzo... everything about Sandy makes you wanna barf...

Rizzo: Gee... now THAT'S the surprise of the century!

Frenchy: Why are you always so mean to Sandy?

Rizzo: Why shouldn't I be?

Eugene: Ahem... ladies, please. Well, yes, good has been done here. Cha-Cha and Danny have exited the scene and are now doing things that... are best left unmentioned. Danny is smiling (gee I wonder why), but, still feeling an emotional attachment for the hairbrush, calls out from the bathroom between humps- err... I mean...

Danny: Take care of my hairbrush! Take care, oh my hairbrush! Take care, take care, don't dare not care, take care, nice hair, no fair, take care, take care ... of my hairbrush! Oww! Not so hard, Cha-Cha! Oooh, nice tongue! Ooh la la! I like! I like! Mmm-hmm-hmmm!

Eugene: ((sneeze!)) The end!

Rizzo: Stupid Australian!

Sandy: ((sniffle)) Hey, what did I do?

Rizzo: ((shrugs)) Idk, that's how we always end our Veggie Tales song chapters. Duh! Stupid Australian!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry for not updating for a long time! Read and Review, por favor! I haven't gotten a review in months!


	11. Danny's Geography Lesson

Chapter 9: Danny's Geography Lesson (Only Makes Sense in Script Form!)

A/N: Wow! "High on Coffee" has been going on for more than a year now! Yahoo!

See? I told you I would update! Hahaha!

Mou... it's summer and I'm losing my English. So if I have some bad grammar... sorry!

And I haven't seen Grease for a year and a half now! Aaaack!

Did you know they have a "Rockin' Rydell" version now? Hmm...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rizzo: OK... who hasn't narrated yet?

Sandy: ((puppy eyes))

Rizzo: ((sigh)) Anyone ELSE who hasn't narrated yet?

Marty: Well... yeah... but we don't wanna do it. Right, Jan?

Jan: Twinkie! w00t! Twinkie! Mine! Mine! All mine! Fame! Fortune! Glory! Twinkie! Baha! MY Twinkie!

Sandy: ((bigger puppy eyes)) Please, Rizzo?

Tom: Yeah, c'mon! You can't resist a face like that!

Rizzo: ((rolls eyes)) OK, OK. You can do it, Miss Goody-Goody.

Sandy: Motherf-ckin' son of a b-tch YES! I mean... ((cough cough))

Everyone else: Oo

Kenickie: Now that's something you don't see everyday!

Marty: Hmm... she's got potential... what do you think, ladies?

Pink Ladies: Yeah... yeah... uh-huh...

Sandy: ((ahem)) OK... so... where's Danny?

Rizzo: You have to say the magic word?

Sandy: What's the magic word?

Danny: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Haha! Can we fix it? Yes we can! We have to have a can-do attitude! Like Offenbach's "Can-can"! ((starts dancing to the Can-can)) Da da dada dada da da dada dada da da dada dada da dadadadadada da da...

Rizzo: Grrrrrr... THAT'S the magic word!

Sandy: I'm guessing Tom already took care of the giant muffler and the... ummm... 568,987,228,934,669,880,958,092.0029348 gallons of coffee?

Tom: Yes... but triumph does not come without pain! He bit me! Can you put some antibiotic on this, sweetheart?

Sandy: Ahhh... later... right now, let's get on with our geography lesson. After all, that's why we're here, right?

Danny: Have you ever tried to play Mozart's Sonata K. 98765672893876587348529349759345? It's really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really hard.

Sandy: I imagine it must be hard to play something that doesn't even exist... Anyways, let's get on with the program. Rizzo and Frenchy should have put Danny into Eugene's Super-Cloner 3000 machine and cloned three Little Danny's. Right?

Frenchy: Yeah... and we've learned our lesson... Danny doesn't fit very well into a 1x1x1 in. box.

Danny: Unless I shrink down to Super Itsy-Bitsy Teeny-Weeny Yellow-Polka-Dot-Bikini Small Danny! Dum da-DUM! Batman!

Frenchy: Which you didn't... because you obviously can't...

Danny: Can-can! Da da dada da da dada dada da da...

Sandy: Where are the Little Danny's?

Rizzo: Uhhh... let's bring them out later... they're sort of hyped-up right now, so Tom is giving them Aspirins...

Tom: Ouch! Son of a--! Take the d-mn Aspirin!

Sandy: OK... there will be a 15-minute intermission. Keep it clean, Tom.

15 Minutes Later...

Sandy: All three Little Danny's are seated nicely at the dinner table, patiently waiting for dinner and hopefully a geography lesson as well. The very caffeinated Danny is busy making dinner for the Little Danny's. He is so caffeinated, in fact, that he has resorted to only speaking in "countries". And of course, whatever Danny does, his clones will follow as well. Confusing? You'll see what I mean in a second.

Rizzo: Wow... that's the most she's ever said at one time...

Tom: Lights! Camera! Action!

Little Danny's: US Hungary!

Danny: Kuwait!

Little Danny's: Norway! US Hungary! Bangladesh! (Israel China!)

Danny: Canada Turkey Greece?

Little Danny's: Oman, Norway!

Danny: Panama Chile?

Little Danny's: Yemen!

All Danny's: ((violently wolf down food))

Rizzo: Is that it? Boy that was a waste of time!

Sandy: But did you learn any geography?

Rizzo: No, I didn't learn anything... Stupid Australian!

Sandy: Hey! ((sniffle)) But this isn't Veggie Tales anymore!

Rizzo: I don't care... Stupid Australian!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Review, por favor!

BTW, I got the geography joke from Nick Jr. magazine. LOL.


	12. Sandy Leaves for Australia Part 1

Chapter 10 – In Which Sandy Leaves for the Other Side of the World

Chapter 10 – In Which Sandy Leaves for the Other Side of the World (Part One)

A/N: Haven't updated for over a year. Sorry. School's been busy lately. Gahhhh... stupid AP's.

I'm never on Fanfiction anymore. I guess I've just lost the interest for writing fanfics. Idk. Anyways... enjoy what I've got now, k?

--

17-year-old Sandy Olsen sat on the steps of her front porch. She stared off into the distance wistfully and let out a sigh of despair.

She had been in California for almost half a year now, but although she was getting used to American customs and lifestyles, there were still a few things that still seemed strange to her. She often found herself homesick and wishing to go back home, to her real home in friendly, exciting, sunny, big-city Sydney, Australia.

The blonde teenager lowered her gaze to the ground and was silent for a moment. That was when she suddenly got a great idea. She quickly stood up and ran into her house, re-energized.

Sandy ran upstairs to her room and took out her school backpack, dumping its textbooks, notebooks, and folders onto the floor but leaving a few pens and pencils. Then she took some articles of clothing from her drawers, folded them neatly, and placed them in her backpack. She ran to the bathroom and packed her toiletries, and ran back to her room to pack a bathing suit, sunglasses, and sunscreen. Lastly, she dug out her passport, an Australian one, and put in the front pocket of her backpack. After she had double-checked everything and zipped everything up, Sandy pushed her backpack next to her bed and headed downstairs for the negotiation of her plan with her mother. The blonde girl was rather worldly and had packed for a trip many times; that was an easy task compared to what she had to do now.

"Mummy!" the blonde girl called out sweetly, using an affectionate name for her mother to try to make a good first impression.

"Yes, honey?" her mother answered cheerfully. "I'm in the kitchen."

Sandy walked to the kitchen, trying to act as innocent as possible, which wasn't very hard for her. She met up with her mother, a woman in her forties who looked as if she had been carved out of the exact same mold as her daughter.

The blonde teenager thought about how to start. "Mum, I've got a favor to ask of you."

"Sure honey," her mother answered, an Australian lilt present in her voice as well. "Anything for my little muffin."

"W-well," Sandy started out a little shakily, "I'm on winter break right now... and I do have a little more than two weeks left before I've got to go back to school... you know, with senior exam exemption and all. So I was thinking... well, I would like to..."

"What, sweetheart?" her mother asked, eager for her daughter to finish her sentence.

"I want to go back to Australia for the remainder of my winter break," the blonde girl blurted, then braced herself for her mother's reaction.

Instead of being surprised or feeling a strong instinct to decline to her daughter's strange request, Mrs. Olsen was very glad. "Why Sandy, honey, I think that's a great idea!" she exclaimed.

Sandy was taken aback. "You do?" she asked.

"Yes, honey! I think it'd be a great thing for you to do!" her mother answered excitedly. "In fact, I just got a letter in the mail yesterday... saying you've been accepted into the Australian National University! I was just about to tell you that you should go back home and visit the uni you'll be going to next year, but you read my mind."

After hearing the words "Australian National University" and "accepted" in the same sentence, Sandy neglected to listen to her mother any further. Instead, she was busy doing a bunch of random cheers to celebrate getting into the top university in Australia.

Mrs. Olsen had to scream to catch her daughter's attention. When Sandy finally came around again, her mother handed her a small package of papers. "These are your tickets and a bit of money," Mrs. Olsen explained. "Your father and I were going to explain all this to you when he got home, but it looks like you've already gotten ahead of us. Anyways, you'll be taking a bus from here to Los Angeles tomorrow morning, and then you'll catch a plane to Sydney from there. Since we've already rented our apartment out to another family, you'll be staying with your aunt." You'll be there for about two weeks and return three days before school starts; should be enough to get over your jetlag."

Sandy gratefully took the tickets and kissed her mother on the cheek. "Thank you, mum! I love you!"

Her mother chuckled. "Don't thank me, honey. Thank yourself. It was your good grades and hard work that got you into the ANU. You'd better go pack, honey. You've got a big day tomorrow."

Sandy hugged her mother once again, then took the money and tickets upstairs to her room and put them in her backpack with her passport. Then she realized... the real hardest part was yet to come.


End file.
